This mock draft took forever.
Despite being wrong all the time, now I know why Mel Kiper and all those draft guys make so much money. It probably equates to less than minimum wage… That said, I fucking love this. Everything about the draft is awesome.
I tried to stay away from conventional thinking, which isn’t very hard to do when you don’t really read any mock drafts. The talking heads are usually so far off you wonder if their sole purpose is to be misleading mouth pieces for NFL GM’s to muddle the waters.
I’ve said this before, but I understand that no one is coming to me for a genuine insider mock draft. However, I do think I provide an objective look from the outside without any bias. I don’t care where these guys go, but I love scouting them because they will go somewhere. And every insight to an NFL team’s philosophy and thought process is valuable information to gain even more insight into how these teams operate. One hand washes the other.
That said, let’s see if I’m close…..
ROUND 1
1. Chicago Bears (via CAR)
Caleb Williams, QB, USC
This pick is obvious. Caleb Williams is the overwhelming consensus #1 prospect in this draft, and has been for two years now. His arm talent is fucking unreal. His ability to make a play out of nothing is the best we’ve seen since Patrick Mahomes. That said, he’s not my #1 QB in this class because of the antics. Painting his fingernails, notably “FUCK UTAH” in the bowl game, is immature. Wearing a dress in GQ is weird. Crying in the stands doesn’t bother me as much as some. But all of this points to him being different, and I’m not sure how that plays in an NFL locker room. By all accounts, though, his teammates like him, he works hard, and he will succeed at a high level in the NFL.
Player Comp: Aaron Rodgers, the Gen Z version.
2. Washington Commanders
Jayden Daniels, QB, LSU
He might want to go to Las Vegas to play under Antonio Pierce, but who wouldn’t want to play for their mentor/good friend? That wouldn’t make me hesitate for one second on this kid. As soon as Jayden Daniels is drafted, he will be the best running QB in the NFL. He moves in a way that we really don’t see from humans outside the NBA. Slippery is the best way to describe his movement; he’s Gumby with the ball in the best way. He’s got a great arm too; maybe not Caleb Williams level, but he has plenty to succeed. But when he gets hit, holy shit, it’s like a cartoon getting blasted by ACME Dynamite.
Player Comp: Robert Griffin III, but smooth, cool, and more elusive.
3. New England Patriots
Drake Maye, QB, North Carolina
Unless the Giants or Vikings trade up with a huge offer, the Patriots will take Drake Maye. The Patriots are nowhere near ready to start a rookie at quarterback, but they don’t need to. And they shouldn’t, their roster is complete dog shit right now. They have a stable veteran in Jacoby Brissett for Drake Maye to sit behind and learn. And he needs to learn A LOT. Maye is jumpy in the pocket, inaccurate on short passes, and has terrible footwork. But he also had the least amount of good coaching in college, so all this is fixable with the right staff. People will laugh but the Dumb and Dumber looking Alex Van Pelt and Ben McAdoo actually know what they’re doing. Drake Maye will be a good player in the NFL.
Player Comp: Justin Herbert, the raw milk version.
4. Arizona Cardinals
Marvin Harrison Jr., WR, Ohio State
Since that video of Monti Ossenfort making his trade down and back up in the 2023 Draft surfaced, he’s been the face of wild draft trade maneuvering. But that was one trade, and they have so many picks this year, they don’t need to move around. Especially with a player like Marvin Harrison Jr. still on the board. Quite possibly the best overall player in the draft is there at 4; easy decision to take him. MHJ has the best hands and body control in the draft. He’s the best WR to come out of the draft in more than 10 years.
Player Comp: AJ Green
5. Los Angeles Chargers
Malik Nabers, WR, LSU
The Chargers have four wide receivers on their roster. They also have only three offensive tackles on their roster. Their first pick will be a WR or OT. With an immediate impact WR on the board and depth at the tackle position, WR makes the most sense. Nabers is not without flaws, he does drop passes from time to time, he will get lazy blocking on occasion, but he is absolutely electric with the ball in his hands. That bodes well for a Greg Roman/Jim Harbaugh offense that will run play action more than most. Nabers on crossing routes is as close to unguardable as anyone in this draft class.
Player Comp: Antonio Brown without CTESPN.
6. New York Giants
JJ McCarthy, QB, Michigan
I’m not buying the hype that the Giants want to trade up for Drake Maye. This sounds like the Giants want the Vikings to trade up for Drake Maye, the Patriots to drop back, and they are left with their guy at 6. Rich Eisen asked McCarthy where he might land and his response was detailed. I love this kid, he’s my QB1. Everyone on planet earth that hasn’t watched him believes he’s a game manager and only a game manager. Me, I don’t see an issue with following the coaches direction and winning. JJ McCarthy is the most self aware quarterback in this draft, which is very much needed in New York. This would be a home run scenario for the Giants.
Here’s a link to the entire interview: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=idKq8ggqi8Q
Player Comp: Matt Ryan with athleticism.
7. Tennessee Titans
Joe Alt, OT, Notre Dame
Joe Alt is one of the best pass blockers I have ever seen. He’s not a mauler in the run game, but the Titans are changing. They let Derrick Henry go, they signed Calvin Ridley, and they brought in Brian Callahan. That certainly looks a lot like a team that’s going to throw the ball more than they have in recent years. And with Brian Callahan comes his pops, Bill Callahan, one of the best offensive line coaches ever. If they go in any other direction here, I would be absolutely shocked. Also, Alt has the longest legs of any player I’ve ever seen. He’s like a 320 lb. spider.
Player Comp: Spider, pholcidaes to be exact.
8. Atlanta Falcons
Quinyon Mitchell, CB, Toledo
The first defensive player off the board is a great fit for the Falcons. Their offense is in order; they needed a veteran in the worst way, and they got one. This team already has too many offensive weapons to keep coming up short. They need playmakers on defense now. I wouldn’t be shocked if Byron Murphy was the pick here. But knowing how Rich McKay emphasizes character, I’d have to imagine Mitchell is a AA player on their board. His loyalty to Toledo, even after offers to transfer to every major school in the country, exemplifies his character. It doesn’t hurt that he’s a bal hawk. Mitchell and AJ Terrell will force a lot of check downs next season.
Player Comp: Sauce Gardner without the bravado.
9. Chicago Bears
Rome Odunze, WR, Washington
Wanting to ride the tracker with his grandfather every day epitomizes Rome Odunze. Rome is a big strong kid who will come to work day one. He’s not afraid to go across the middle and get hit, and most of the time he comes down with the ball. He has strong hands, is a good route runner, and plays physical. He does drop some balls, he’s not perfect Odunze recently worked out with DJ Moore, Keenan Allen, and Caleb Williams. Williams has been talking up Odunze for the past two weeks and he’s getting louder about it. The Bears would be smart to keep their unique quarterback happy.
Player Comp: Devonte Adams without receiver gloves.
10. New York Jets
Brock Bowers, TE, Georgia
Not even the Jets could fuck this pick up. Like the Chargers, the Jets are in perfect position to take an offensive playmaker in Brock Bowers or their future LT and insurance blocker. I think they’re going all in, not like the Cowboys, like they are for real going all in. The Jets have the ability to open up that offense by allowing Bowers to control the middle of the field, which allows Garrett Wilson to work downfield and allows Breece Hall to leak out of the backfield and move. I would understand an offensive lineman here, but for me Bowers is too sexy to pass up here.
Player Comp: Sam LaPorta
11. Minnesota Vikings
Byron Murphy, DT, Texas
Although not a typical staple of a Brian Flores defense, a disruptive defensive tackle on the Vikings would go a long way in freeing up space for newly acquired Jonathan Greenard. I could see a multitude of different players being taken here; Laiatu Lata, Terrion Arnold, or even Cooper DeJean. But ultimately they go with the best DT in this draft, a position that is extremely shallow after the top two and varying depending on scheme fit.
Player Comp: Javon Hargrave
12. Denver Broncos
Amarius Mims, OT, Georgia
Freakishly huge and very raw. He’ll need some refining at the next level, but his potential is extremely high considering his size. Watching his tape, at times you feel like he’s literally unstoppable. He mauls people in the run game and will only get better. The Broncos are not in win now mode so he’ll have time to develop. Sean Payton has always enjoyed projects and has drafted based on traits in the past. Apparently, the Broncos have shone a ton of interest. But who the fuck knows, this could be any position, this is another dog shit roster.
Player Comp: Tyron Smith but bigger.
13. Las Vegas Raiders
Troy Fautanu, OT, Washington
Like a lot of the tackles in this class, Fautanu is ready to start right now. He can play tackle or guard on either side. Antonio Pierce is going to love this kids seek and destroy attitude. In the run game, if he gets his hands on you, you’re fucked. In the pass game, he could be beaten by faster edge rushers, but he’ll have plenty of practice during the week against Crosby and Wilkins.
Player Comp: Rashawn Slater, almost exactly the same profile when drafted.
14. New Orleans Saints
Brian Thomas Jr. , WR, LSU
The Saints made some terrific signings on defense in the offseason. They saw holes, they filled holes. They have awesome depth, especially up front, their secondary is elite, but they need a spark on offense. Brian Thomas is that spark. Chris Olave is great, but he’s not the powerful deep threat that Thomas is. This is a perfect fit.
Player Comp: DK Metcalf, not as many threesomes.
15. Indianapolis Colts
Terrion Arnold, CB, Alabama
The Colts need someone who can play press man coverage. Arnold is that guy. They didn’t run too much press man at Alabama and usually that’s a sign of what a player can or can’t do. However, Saban plays uniform coverage on the outside and Kool-Aid McKinstry is not a press man corner. Oddly enough, when they wanted to, Alabama played a hybrid zone while allowing Terrion to play press man. They did this against LSU, Texas, and Michigan and it worked. The Colts Gus Bradley needs his corners to be physical and Arnold is that guy.
Player Comp: Devon Witherspoon, poor mans version.
16. Seattle Seahawks
Chop Robinson, EDGE, Penn State
Evaluations are all over the board on Robinson. He is gifted athletically and production matched at Penn State. But I have a different opinion on Chop Robinson. I think he’s better suited to put on more weight and transition to defensive tackle. He’s very powerful, he gets off blockers, and attacks running backs. From the edge, he isn’t going to overwhelm tackles with his speed, but put him inside and force defenses to deal with all his bullshit, now we are cooking with a flame thrower. Mike Macdonald gets his interior disruptor if he sees what I sees.
Player Comp: Justin Madubuike
17. Jacksonville Jaguars
Kool-Aid McKinstry, CB, Alabama
The Jaguars need a cornerback. Kool-Aid is better suited to a zone defense. He’s not a great tackler and he has a lot to learn is terms of discipline. Too many times he had to turn and chase. I’m not sure he turns out to be a great or even good cornerback. Ryan Neilsen is a very good teacher so maybe he can get the best out of him, but I don’t see more than a rotational player.
Player Comp: Harrison Smith minus the toughness.
18. Cincinnati Bengals
Ladd McConkey, WR, Georgia
I hope this happens. This would be one of my favorite destinations for and fits for Ladd McConkey. I’m also higher on McConkey than most at WR3. The Bengals entire offense is predicated on short passes setting up deep passes. Right now, they don’t have that slot receiver that can find the open spot in a zone and get you that tough 6 yards. Please make this happen Bengals.
Player Comp: Tank Dell
19. Los Angeles Rams
Jer’Zhan Newton, DT, Illinois
Johnny Newton is a fun player. Explosive in the middle. Can get lost in the run game just a bit, but that could be coached focusing on balance. The lost Aaron Donald to retirement, why not team him up with Kobie Turner to form a super duo in the middle?
Player Comp: Christian Wilkins
20. Pittsburgh Steelers
Taliese Fuaga, OT, Oregon State
The Steelers would love to be in this position. Fuaga is a bit of a tweener. I think he could be a dominant guard in the NFL similar to Iken Ekwonu, who I also think is better suited at guard. But I also feel he’s talented enough to eventually play LT. The Steelers have interest and evidently would run to the podium with this card.
Player Comp: Ikem Ekwonu
21. Miami Dolphins
Graham Barton, OL, Duke
I choose to designate Graham Barton as offensive lineman, because he can and has played everywhere. Some think he’s a center, some think he can still play tackle, I think he is going to be a top 5 guard in the NFL. I love what this kid can do. He handled twists up front with ease. He covered up a lot of deficiencies on the Duke offensive line. I think he’s a day 1 starting guard in the NFL.
Player Comp: Quenton Nelson, but not a jock with sunglasses.
22. Philadelphia Eagles
Nate Wiggins, CB, Clemson
Exactly what the Eagles need. A speedy corner with ball skills. They need someone to take over for James Bradberry who is a liability in the secondary. I don’t think Kelee Ringo is that guy considering his size and speed, or lack thereof. Eagles get their Asante Samuel Jr. and 4 picks that come with him.
Player Comp: Asante Samuel Jr. stretched out.
23. Minnesota Vikings (via CLE )
Michael Penix Jr., QB, Washington
Michael Penix Jr. has a great arm. He used that arm to throw for 9,500 yards and 67 touchdowns at Washington. I give him a ton of credit for that; I also give Kalen DeBoer a ton of credit for that as well. DeBoer essentially told Penix to grip it and rip it, and he did. Some believe Penix is a diamond is the not so rough. I just don’t see it. Yes, he has highlight reel throws, more than a few of them. But I’m not looking past the over throws to wide open receivers. I’m not looking past the seeming inability to throw crossing routes. He had a great 40 time, 4.46, and that elevates some knee questions. But I’m not impressed by straight line speed for a quarterback who doesn’t leave the pocket. I’m sorry, but Penix just doesn’t do it for me.
By the way, I think DeBoer does the same thing to Jalen Milroe this year at Alabama…
Player Comp: Hendon Hooker
24. Dallas Cowboys
Tyler Guyton, OT, Oklahoma
One of my favorite players in this draft. He’s a fucking bully in the best way. He mauls people in the run game, he’s learning in the pass game too. At 6’8″ he’s still athletic enough to handle any type of rusher. I think Guyton could end up being the best all around tackle from this draft class.
Player Comp: Tristan Wirfs
25. Green Bay Packers
Jared Verse, EDGE, Florida State
Get the fuck out of my way is the best way to describe Jared Verse. He’s not my number one edge rusher, but he will be solid at the next level. Everything he does translates well to the NFL. He can rush the passer and defend the run. He’ll demand double teams and chase down throwers. If you need a solid, dependable rusher, this is your guy.
Player Comp: Za’Darius Smith but more compact.
26. Tampa Bay Buccaneers
Laiatu Latu, EDGE, UCLA
The steal of the draft at 26. Laiatu Latu is the best pure pass rusher in this draft and it is not close…..at all. He will get at the quarterback where ever he goes. His speed off the edge is unmatched. He is a top 5 pick if not for one small detail. Latu medically retired from football after the 2019 season due to a neck injury. The Washington Huskies staff didn’t medially clear him to play. Then, UCLA did and he shined. This dude can flat out rush the passer.
Player Comp: Maxx Crosby
27. Arizona Cardinals (via HOU)
Patrick Paul, OT, Houston
Paul is a physical freak. He has a lot to learn if he’s going to be a long term starter in the NFL, but a team is going to take a chance on him considering his size and athletic ability. He is the reason the NFL Combine exists.
Player Comp: Jason Peters, but nowhere near as good.
28. Buffalo Bills
Keon Coleman, WR, Florida State
Keon Coleman is a tough guy to evaluate. He made some insane catches over the middle at FSU, but he made those catches in part because he doesn’t separate. The Bills might find his traits impressive considering they traded for Diggs because he caught balls over the middle and drafted Gabe Davis for his size. Coleman could work in Buffalo, but he’ll need to stay true to who he is. If the Bills ask him to be something he’s not, he won’y make it in the NFL.
Player Comp: Sammy Watkins
29. Detroit Lions
Cooper DeJean, CB/S, Iowa
Detroit loves tough players. Especially, tough players from Iowa. This pick just makes sense. The Lions secondary sucks and they lost Cameron Sutton because he’s an idiot. The NFC North is loaded with mismatch receivers and tight ends, Cooper DeJean is the answer to those guys. Bite knee caps kid.
Player Comp: Antoine Winfield Jr.
30. Baltimore Ravens
Adonai Mitchell, WR, Texas
Body control is Mitchell’s best trait. He uses his size well, and with long arms and his body control he is going to be a major red area target. If Mitchell is able to toughen up a bit and go over the middle without alligator arms, he could be one of the best receivers in football. He MUST use his size to have success at the NFL level. I’m not ever going to tell anyone to put their body on the line unless they want to, Mitchell needs to want to.
Player Comp: Mike Evans, but not as tough.
31. San Francisco 49ers
Kingsley Suamataia, OT, BYU
This dude is a scary person. Something about long arms on a slow moving body reminds me of a monster, maybe Frankenstein? I don’t know but this guy is a Lurch. He’ll be well trained in San Francisco, and gets to learn from one of the best to ever do it.
Player Comp: Tytus Howard
32. Kansas City Chiefs
Olu Fashanu, OT, Penn State
Is he a tackle? Is he a guard? He has the athletic ability to become a great LT. But… when are we gonna see it? Some people feel that Fashanu is a top 3 tackle in this draft. I don’t see it, and I think it’s based only on traits because it doesn’t show up on film. The Chiefs might take a shot here with Fashanu; they took a shot at Jawaan Taylor and that worked, I think.
Player Comp: Anton Harrison
